by Rosemarie Brown,
MSW, DIHom
A basic premise in all health care approaches, is not to add to the problem.

"When do we cross the line of unacceptable and hurtful behavior?"

Knowing at any moment, day or night, that her child could die
kept Sara
in a constant state of hyper-vigilance and fear.

…she could not trust the remedy to be correct since she felt no trust toward the prescriber. Silica is excellent for under- nourishment and is used to help build up a depleted system.

ll of us, at one time or another, do not communicate effectively. Communication is an art which must be consistently practiced and improved upon. It should be a conscious act with thought and focus.

Even under the best of circumstances, misunderstanding occurs. This is especially true between males and females. Each gender has their unique way of relating to each other and to their environment. In general, the female is able to utilize, more fully, both brain hemispheres. Whereas males rely mostly on the left hemisphere. Females are more aware of the internal dynamics of life. Males are focused upon the outer world. The male focus is more on problem solving while females are attempting to understand all aspects of an issue fully before making a decision to act.

Healthy communication skills are essential for those in the health care fields. Simply, what we `say' and `hear' affects another's well-being. Particularly with homeopathy, what is `heard', what is `asked', and, how questions are asked, makes a critical difference in choosing the correct remedy. The well chosen remedy, as Hahnemann refers to, can only be as well chosen as the homeopath's well chosen words and questions to illicit full responses from the patient; and how well the homeopath hears the patient's responses. The ability to `ask, hear and speak' clearly, is further complicated by the different genders and how each processes information. This is especially true with a male homeopath treating a female patient.

A homeopath, male or female, must have a solid base in the knowledge of the remedies and rubrics. However, if the male homeopath can not effectively relate to the female patient, the training and knowledge is wasted. Even worse, potential harm can be done. A basic premise in all health care approaches, is not to add to the problem: do not create greater harm.

Confronted with the issue of not adding to the problem, each of us would fully agree. However, an individual sees the world through their own unique lens of reality, which is further influenced by gender. What is improper to one is acceptable to another. Throughout our human history, atrocities have been committed in the name of a philosophy, a belief system, or a religion. Each view believes themselves to be `right', even though emotional and physical pain has resulted.

A health care professional, male or female, has an obligation to the people served, to be constantly checking for intimidating, disrespectful, abusive, or violating behavior. A homeopath, as a professional, is expected to behave with integrity, compassion and understanding without judgment. The male homeopath making assumptions about what the female patient has said bears a big danger for mis-understanding. The male homeopath must change his focus. He must become more conscious of her feelings and strive to understand her inner thought dynamics, since that is the basis of her perceptual world. Becoming a conscious empathic listener is essential to being able to enter her meaning system. By reaching for these depths within the female patient, finding the correct remedy becomes more probable, and more complete healing results.

All of us must continually clean our own lens through which we see the world. What clouds our vision are our own unresolved hurts and wounds which can gather and influence our decision making in treating a patient. We are not able to see the other for whom they are. Unfortunately, when the other is a female patient who is vulnerable, harm can be done by the male homeopath. A person seeks out a homeopath for healing and relief from pain. A great injustice occurs when the male homeopath's own disharmony or illness adds to the patient's problems.

A critical question which must be asked is, "When do we cross the line of unacceptable and hurtful behavior?" To help identify such behavior, the following is an example of an actual case where inappropriate communication techniques were used by a male homeopath. The case was taken during a homeopathic class. The female patient had volunteered to give the class opportunity to practice case taking. The instructor frequently brings patients into the classroom to give students the needed experience in the case taking process, which can generally be a great teaching tool. The class comprised about twenty students of both sexes, various ages and backgrounds. A few medical doctors and a psychotherapist were part of it, too. The instructor has a reputation for his extensive knowledge of homeopathic remedies and has been teaching for several years. The problem with communication did not come from the students.

The case presented was of an infant girl, Amanda, 1-year-old. Amanda had been brought by her mother, Sara. Amanda had been born three months premature. With such an early birth, there were a number of complications which will continue throughout several years of Amanda's childhood. During the first three months of life, Amanda was in the hospital in intensive care. She survived one health crisis after another, which included constant antibiotics, several blood transfusions, breathing difficulties (apnea which could have led to Sudden Infant Death Syndrome), and potential brain damage. She was also given caffeine to stimulate her under developed nervous system. Each crisis meant a fight for life and death to this little girl.

Sara uses alternative healing methods extensively and wanted to support her daughter's healing with homeopathic treatment. Sara believed Amanda's vital force could be greatly helped with homeopathic treatment to build up deficiencies and correct problems from the early traumas. It was with this intent that Sara came to the class.

Sara held Amanda and sat in front of the students. The students began asking questions about the pregnancy and the first year of life. Sara gave the medical history and shared her concerns for Amanda. Included were Sara's own fears and traumas of the past year. Knowing at any moment, day or night, that her child could die kept Sara in a constant state of hyper-vigilance and fear. What Sara and Amanda both needed were understanding and gentle health practitioners.

At the conclusion of the case information, the instructor asked the class what remedy considerations came to their minds. The students threw out ideas about possibilities. The instructor rejected the suggested ones. The instructor began to pace throughout the classroom. He was becoming very annoyed with his students for not thinking clearly. He accused them in a loud voice of being lazy and stupid. He charged them with limited thinking by not considering the possibilities of remedies in the strange, rare, and peculiar categories. After several minutes of humiliating his students, he stated, "Okay, I will give you a break and tell you."

The instructor then pointed out the different shape of Amanda's head. It was larger than the rest of her body. He referred to the shape of it as looking like an `extraterrestrial alien', from another planet. He stated that because of her unusual appearance, an uncommon remedy should be considered. Based upon two other considerations, one being difficulty with breathing, he decided the remedy should be Latrodectus mactans, the Black Widow Spider, at 30C. He stated both the mother and child should be given the remedy at the same time since they were still very closely connected and both had issues.

Sara asked the instructor for more information about the remedy and the reasoning for it. The instructor responded with some information. Sara continued to ask further questions. The instructor turned to her and stated in an angry tone, "Do you want a remedy? Then don't argue with me!!!" He repeated these words several times, still, in angry humiliating tones. Sara attempted to explain her desire to understand. He continued not to answer and warned her off again, repeating: "Be quiet, be quiet." Sara suddenly became quiet with the appearance of being hurt, angry, confused and humiliated.

Seeing she was angry, the instructor pointed out to the class that Sara was becoming upset. He then made an analogy that like the Black Widow, she was attacking the male.

After class, for several weeks and months, Sara felt the humiliation, and yes, anger from the session. She decided not to take or give the remedy to her daughter. She felt that since it had been such a negative experience, she could not trust the remedy to be correct since she felt no trust toward the prescriber. Sara did not want to subject her daughter to yet another health crisis.

Some months later, Sara happened to meet the female psychotherapist who was one of the students. The psychotherapist asked if she had taken the remedy or had given it to her daughter. Sara replied, "No." Sara was then asked how she had felt about the session. Sara expressed her feelings of disappointment and injury. The psychotherapist commented and agreed that the instructor's behavior was destructive and abusive.

Sara did continue in her search for a homeopath who could help her daughter. She did find a second one who was also male. After taking Amanda's case, he prescribed the remedy Tuberculinum at 1M potency. A few weeks after taking this remedy, Amanda was admitted to the hospital with pneumonia. The second homeopath was not abusive and did have a sincere desire to help. However, he too was not able to hear what Sara had said about her daughter's symptoms. Was the view from a male perspective again interfering? Should questions have been asked differently? There were indications in Amanda's case that Tuberculinum could be helpful in the future. It was simply not the right time for this remedy or the powerful potency.

A third homeopath was then consulted, a female, who took Amanda's case. The remedy chosen was Silica at a potency of 30C, one dose. Amanda was underweight, with no interest in food, and had difficulty in sleeping. After taking Silica, she began eating, started gaining weight, and her sleep was no longer as disturbed. Silica is excellent for under-nourishment and is used to help build up a depleted system. It also strengthens connective tissue. Amanda needed to be supported and a foundation needed to be built before any type of constitutional treatment could be effective. Latrodectus mactans, the first prescribed remedy, could have created enormous complications. The third homeopath addressed Amanda's basic needs first. This homeopath had the broader view of the steps which needed to be taken first instead of jumping ahead. As with any building or house, the foundation must be there. The primary focus for help with Amanda was to give her stability, which she never had had since coming out of her mother's womb. The female homeopath was able to assess and hear the needs of her patient.

With the first and second homeopath, it appeared that the needs of the patient were overlooked. The essence of the child was not addressed. An infant with Amanda's medical history required the basics of life to give her the boost she needed. to p. 2